Far too many people are under the impression that it is impossible to be friends with an ex. Well, I absolutely disagree with that. I'm not saying that everyone can do it but, it can be done. It all depends on the individuals and, the circumstances surrounding their past and current relationship. I met a boy in public school who became my boyfriend. We dated off and on throughout Public School and Junior High School. Though we broke up some where down the line, we still remained friends. Years later, in my adulthood we reconnected and, maintained a friendly physical only relationship while seeing other people but, never while either one of us were in a serious relationship.

This man and I would talk to each other about our trysts with other people as if we never dating at all because we always were and, still are friends. When he was on his way down the aisle, I was invited and went to the wedding. There have been times when his wife and I would chat on the phone or, hang out with no problem. We have also shared events with all of our children getting along just as we did as friends when we first met. Though we've spent many years having physical relations, that time has passed and, we no longer look at each other in that manner. As a matter of fact, we don't even joke about anything sexual, it just doesn't come up. Plus, we respect each other far too much to go that route. If you and your ex truly have an understanding, especially if you broke up on a mutual and agreeable note then, you can actually have a non-sexual friendly relationship with your ex. It can definitely be done.

To this day, a few of my exes and, I are like the best of friends. So, don't let people convince you that having your ex as a friend is impossible. Sometimes, it can actually be a blessing because, they may know things about you that can possibly help you out in the long run. Your ex has been with you so maybe, they're easy to talk to. Or, they may be a fantastic hang out buddy. Don't get me wrong sometimes, having your ex as a friend can be a total disaster. In some instances, an ex may feel as though you're forever theirs. Therefore, showing signs of possessive behavior at the mere mention of you being with someone else. Also, there's the chance of them causing unnecessary trouble between you and, your present partner should they run into you. It's a catch 22 having your ex as a friend but, it can be done.

Having gone through two situations whereas, living together proved to be the best choice; I would have to say living together before marriage can turn out to be for the best, in some cases. By living together, you can learn a lot about a person before being bound by marriage. Should you decide to live together first, you could possibly avoid a long-term relationship with someone who has what I call the "JEKYLL & HYDE SYNDROME".

Living together first, nor marriage is a guarantee. But I do feel that learning a persons habits, and mannerisms before tying the knot can save you a world of headaches, and heartache down the road. Once you walk down the aisle, and say your "I Do's", it can be harder to get out of a relationship which is sometimes, physically, emotionally, and or, verbally abusive which, can also be detrimental to ones health.

A lot of grown-ups now, and back in the day believe that living together before marriage is a sin. But I think people's outlook on that has changed tremendously, and it is no longer frowned upon as much as it used to be. Although, many older folks still believe you should just go ahead, and tie the knot. I guess they strongly believe in, "Till Death Do Us Part", and whatever happens within the marriage should be dealt with, and worked out. A lot of the older folks believe that divorce is totally out of the question. Personally, I would definitely live together before getting married.

Too many relationships are ruined, because of insecurities, and not enough trust. There are people who actually love with their whole heart, and their entire being honestly. Those are the ones who will love, trust, and may even forgive you for little indiscretions. They love the whole idea of love, and being in love therefore, trying their best to make things work. Then, there are the ones who say they love you, and may actually love to a point, but just have trust issues.

Sometimes, being unable to trust someone can come from issues from previous relationships, or other happenings. But it can also come purely from ones own guilt. I've seen too many couples who appear to be a match made in heaven on the surface, as the saying goes. But underneath it all, there's nothing but accusations, disbelief, verbal, emotional, and sometimes physical abuse all because of the insecurity of one person.

There are times whereas, one feels the overwhelming fear of losing their partner, so Dr. Jekyll rears his ugly head, so to speak. That's when the relationship takes a hard hit, and starts to head downhill. The most innocent people are constantly being accused of doing things they're not doing, because the partner is so insecure. But what really puzzles me is when a person, male, or female is the type who doesn't hang out much. They only go to places like, the store, or work and back home.

Also, there are some who stay home with the children all day, every day, so what's to be insecure about? Where is the time in between to give your partner something to be insecure about? Sometimes, there are people who cheat on there partners like it's no big deal, and make you feel to blame for the insecurities within the relationship. That person may also have absolutely no problem lying to your face, or making you feel like you're the reason for them cheating. Yet, they will follow you to the ends of the earth, just to make sure you're not cheating, isn't that the pot calling the kettle black?

If people actually took the time to pay close attention to what's going on in their relationships, or not going on, there would probably be less need to be insecure. Also, guilt sometimes play a major part in the overall success, or lack there of in a relationship. People should learn to love, honor, and respect each other in order to maintain a happy, and healthy relationship without insecurities.

This article describes some of the most important factors necessary to attain, and maintain a happy and healthy relationship. There are many aspects of a relationship that people say they are aware of, but do not apply them within their own relationships.

You will learn how to enhance your ability to appreciate the one you are with. If this method is put into play within your relationship, I believe you will also feel a sense of love greater than you ever thought possible.

The only thing you will need is the ability to open your mind, and absorb the good advice being presented to you in this article. If you are currently unhappy within your relationship then, you have nothing to lose.

Step 1: The first thing you need to do is figure out whether or not, you truly love the person you are with. If you realize that person is someone you do not want to be without, then making a few minor changes in the way you do things should not be a problem. Too many relationships fail due to disrespect, dishonesty, infidelity, and sometimes pure selfishness. A lot of times people tend to disregard the feelings of their partner. Anytime you accept someone to share your life with you whether they are married, lovers, or friends with benefits, it does not matter. As long as you are with someone, they deserve for you to be respectful, honest, unselfish, and above all faithful.

Step 2: Once you realize you are in love with someone, all the things like cheating, looking at other men or women, staying out all hours of the night, verbal, physical, and emotional abuse should never enter your mind, nor your relationship. In addition, keeping feelings, thoughts, and concerns bottled up inside is not healthy for a relationship. More people need to open up, and talk about things of concern. It may not always be pleasant to hear what your partner has to say. However, if you open up and talk about it then maybe the two of you can find a solution, and come to an understanding. In some cases, the subject may be about your performance, or lack there of in bed. Don’t be afraid to let yourpartner know what you would like in bed, at the same time try asking them what can you do to please them. NEVER! Be selfish in bed. Spend time together taking walks, exercising or watching TV. Take turns giving each other massages when they come home from a hard days work or, just because you love them. Hold hands walking down the street. Practice doing things to them that you would like done to you.

Step 3: The little things within a relationship goes a long way. So many people do little sweet things for their partner when the relationship is fresh and new. However, as time goes on, things become routine, boring and stale. This can sometimes lead to becoming bored with one another. I feel that spontaneity within a relationship will help to spice things up a bit. I am not saying that you have to do anything extravagant, nor does money always have to be involved. Being that times are tough right now with the economy the way it is, relationships may be tested, and strained more than ever before. Therefore, you need to come together, and be there for each other. When you are doing things like, getting yourself something to eat, or drink; ask your partner if they would like something at the same time. If you are eating together, and you get up first, offer to take their plate. Instead of one person doing all the chores, try to share the responsibilities. Get into the habit of realizing it is no longer me it is, we.

Tips & Warnings:

I CAN NOT guarantee that this will work for everyone. However, if you apply the information in this article to your relationship, I strongly believe you will see a change for the better. I did, and it worked wonders for me.